Our Story

I read a lot of relationship advice blogs because hey! it is hard work to keep a marriage going and any advice helps. Recently, many of these blog authors have been posting stories of how they met their significant other, so I thought I would share hubby and my comedy of errors which led to our marriage.

James and I met in library school during a rather confusing time in my life. I had decided to focus all my energy on graduate school and the beginning stages of my career. Men served their purpose as friends and fun dates, but I was determined not to have a relationship since it would be a detriment to my career plans.

James first impression of me was not a good one. If you have ever seen me in a rant, you understand that no man would want to date someone who gets that riled up. If you have never had the joy, this image gives you an idea. (No, I was not a bridezilla. This pic is after our room had been changed four times, including an hour before the wedding, no electricity, and this is the moment I found out the cake was missing.) So, James didn't think much of me at the time, which was fine since I thought he was a perfect fit for my male friend, Aaron. Yep, you read that right, I was trying to set James up with another guy. Eventually, I learned James dated women, so Aaron and I enjoyed the eye candy James provided.

After a week of Aaron nagging me that James was a good guy and I should give him a chance, I finally asked James to have a drink after class. James and I closed the bar down because we were having such a fun and engrossing conversation. James and I had many more moments of miscommunication, including our first kiss, when he asked if he could kiss me. I told him to get out because I was shocked that he asked. He thought I meant get out of the car, so he did. This was the moment I realized this guy was not a fling. The first time I tried to express my love for him, I couldn't get the words out. James finally took pity on me and said, I love you too.

And the funniest time we had a breakdown in communication was Memorial Day weekend, four months after we began dating. I was sending out resumes and thought James and I should have the talk about what would happen to our relationship since our careers would take us in different directions. I was on a roll, explaining to James that should we end up in the same city, we could continue dating, but otherwise, I wasn't interested in a long distance relationship. I also told him that we should slow down, since we didn't know where we would end up and I had no intention of letting a guy get in the way of my career plans. In the middle of my diatribe, James tossed in the fact, he planned to spend the rest of his life with me and wanted to marry me. I ignored his comments and continued until it hit me what he had said. Yes folks, this was my romantic proposal, no ring, no bended knee, just a guy sitting in a coffee shop, trying to convince his girlfriend not to end their relationship.

Honestly, I didn't believe him at first. It required several hand-delivered bridal magazines for me to believe he was serious. The agreement we came to involving our careers was whoever received the first job offer that was acceptable to both of us, that was where we would move. We didn't realize at the time this would create the dynamic that would permeate our marriage. Because of my career, James has moved with me to three different cities and we now maintain a long distance marriage because of that decision. As for our engagement, I didn't receive my ring until seven months after the proposal. Many people began to question if James would ever buy me a ring or if we were really getting married. I used to explain that the wedding was on since James had paid for the wedding.

So there you have it! The crazy roller coaster mayhem that led to what will be my nine year marriage in February and ten year relationship with James in January, though, knowing us, does this story surprise anyone?